Poop clothes

I had a revelation yesterday. It was amazing.

I’ve been noticing that I’m quite regular while at work. I poop at least once a day. But when I’m away from work for a few days, I hardly poop at all. Sometimes I go for 4-5 days without pooping. But then as soon as I get back to work, I run to the pooper and shoot one out.

At first, I thought it might have something to do with my chair at work. Maybe sitting in a chair in front of a computer aligns my bowels and just makes me want to poop. This makes sense since I don’t sit at a computer when I’m not at work.

But then yesterday it hit me: It’s my work clothes. And not just the clothes, but how they’re worn. I wear button-down shirts tucked into khakis with a belt. When the shirt is tucked in, the belt puts just enough pressure on my lower stomach to get me ready for a poop. It’s not that my pants are too tight; they fit perfectly. And this whole thing doesn’t happen when my shirt’s not tucked in. I wear the same belt all the time, so all my pants should be identically tight around the waist. It’s only when I have a shirt tucked into my pants that the belt presses on my bowels. Pressure on bowels induces pooping. Revelation!