Post-date farting

June 30, 2006

[Ok, so the vast majority of my posts are about farting. What’s the big deal? It’s a great topic and I have a lot to say about it.]

One of the most action-packed events in human history is the drive home after a date with a girl. After you’ve spent several hours eating, talking, watching movies, and doing other stupid cuddly date things, you drive home and have sweet dreams about your little love interest. But before you get in bed — in fact, as soon as you get in your car — you unleash the wrath that had been boiling up inside your bowels for the past eternity. You fart so loud, you wonder if pedestrians can hear it. You fart so hard, you wonder if you just blew out your O-ring. You fart so big, you wonder how such an enormous volume of gas could possibly fit in a single human being.

A while ago, I thought I was the only one who did this. In fact, I didn’t think much of it; it wasn’t a significant event in my life. But I’ve heard several other people tell their stories of post-date farting, and it brings joy to my heart. What a great thing farting is!

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7 Responses to “Post-date farting”

  1. happychick Says:

    Indeed, this has never happened to me,and my flatulence is hardly as exciting as yours, but yes, the ability to pass wind is, releiving.

  2. divide Says:

    After you’ve dated your boyfriend for a while and you’re comfortable with it, ask him about it. I bet he does it when he’s driving home.

    Farting is great.

  3. happychick Says:

    When he’s old enough to get his license, that is. 🙂

  4. divide Says:

    Oh wow, you guys are young kids. Maybe the walk home?

  5. happychick Says:

    *Snorts*. We’re not that young. Even if perhaps I act it.

  6. melissa Says:

    I’ve done this after a lot of dates.

  7. jennifer Says:

    Before I farted in front of my now husband, after a date, I would get into my car (a miata at the time) and would be scared that the pressure from the farts I was holding in all night would propel my right through the roof!

    What a great website!


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