Hand washing

March 20, 2006

I’ll be quite honest: I don’t like washing my hands after I go to the bathroom. If I stand at a urinal and pee without getting any on my hands, why should I wash them? Yeah sure my genitals are “dirty”, but how much of that “dirt” is really all that bad? I take a shower every day. Yeah sure there are some really gross germs on the flusher, but what’s the big deal? When I actually do wash my hands, I just sprinkle some cold water on the tips of my fingers. This is mainly to give the illusion that I’m washing my hands. In reality, how much can cold water actually do? Waiting for warm water usually takes some time … time I’m not willing to waste to wait for a water heater to spit out warm water. Plus, cold water is uncomfortable … because it’s cold. And let’s face it: I’m all about me. I don’t want to be uncomfortable. So I’m gonna continue not washing my hands.

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8 Responses to “Hand washing”

  1. Youra Pig Says:

    I hope this is a joke…otherwise this dude is a filthy, fucking pig!

    Gee, I wonder why so many people get sick? Maybe this asshole holds the key to that answer!

  2. divide Says:

    Why does everyone hate me? I know I’m gross, but is there a need for hate? Spread the love.

    Also, this commenter’s IP address is 199.101.9.48 and he/she goes to Chemeketa Community College in Salem, Oregon.

  3. happychick Says:

    Dear me, dont these people know that sharing is caring? Personally, I figure that you say what everyone else is thinkingg (and that if I ever meet you, I’ll be sure not to shake your hand).

  4. divide Says:

    Ah, supporting words from my biggest fan/supporter, happychick! This stuff is what everyone’s thinking, right? Or is it just me?

    “…if I ever meet you…” — You wouldn’t know it was me because I look normal on the outside.

  5. happychick Says:

    If we’re going to be honest (God forbid anyone I know reads this), I rarely wash my hands after peeing. Providing there’s no pee on them, of course. As for this “biggest fan/supporter” stuff, let me point out- I am your ONLY fan. Everyone else sends you hate mail. 🙂

  6. Jake Says:

    Wally in DILBERT once asked why he should bother to wash his bathroom towel, pointing out that after he showered “he was the cleanest thing in the house, therefore the towel should be getting progressively cleaner”.
    Same with my penis. I take a shower, give it a good scrub, put on clean underwear, and thus it’s pretty damn clean.
    However, my hands are continually touching communal filth.
    So I wash my hands BEFORE I piss so I don’t get some yuck on my penis.

    And about the whole “washing hands” after issue: good lord, who actually in the process of taking a dumb manages to get feces on their hands? Barring a “poke-through” when using cheap toilet paper…

    If everyone out there is getting crap on their hands after they shit, then I sure as hell don’t want to touch the water taps after them. I don’t want to touch anything at all in a public toilet–I use my foot to flush.

  7. Jake Says:

    meant “dump” instead of “dumb”, derrr

  8. Jessi13 Says:

    Well It’s not that gross alot of people dont wash their hand BIG DEAL who cares? Really who cares?


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